Tuesday, May 02, 2006

"Peter Rottentail" review

Peter Rottentail (2004)

Directed by John Polonia Mark Polonia
Writing credits John Oak Dalton John Polonia

Brice Kennedy.... Lenny Neely
Dave Fife.... James Neely
John Polonia.... Peter Rottentail, Tejeda
Brian Berry.... Peter Krigstein

The cast of "Razorteeth" reunites to torment us once more. We haven't suffered enough. This time, the result is "Peter Rottentail", a killer rabbit-man flick. A magician swallows a Rottentail potion and promptly dies. Years later, two misfits read a spell and Rottentail comes hopping out of his grave. He's a giant bunny rabbit who wears a suit and hat. Rottentail kills various people for fun and wants to finish off the two brats who made fun of him years ago. The brats have now grown up into two slackers who wonder what they've done to deserve the bunny man's wrath. I know the reason. They're in a terrible B-movie of course. Peter Rottentail doesn't need to know any more than that. Here comes Peter Rottentail, hopping down the rotten trail...

"Peter Rottentail" is lame. A very depressing "blah" feeling will wash over you as the movie ends. You'll think about all of the cool things you could have been doing instead of watching this pathetic movie. At least I laughed a couple of times at "Razorteeth". This flick just had me depressed at its nothingness. It deserves a good bashing.

Here are a couple of things. First, why does the giant white bunny rabbit have black hairy hands? Did they run out of rabbit costumes at the Dollar store and had to go with a leftover gorilla suit? One guy goes out to a strip club. Well, he says it's a strip club but it's the only one I know where there is siding on the walls and an ancient pinball machine in it. I wondered why they even bothered putting a scene in a strip club since I knew this movie couldn't possibly afford any nudity. I was right as the whole "strip club" scene consists of the camera looking at the guy! No strippers at the strip club. Genius! The main fatality with this one is Rottentail. He makes lots of lame jokes and even lamer kills. He's one lame bunny. Let Peter Rottentail hop, hop, hop away.

SCORE: 1 out of 4 dead bunnys

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