Friday, August 25, 2006

"Commando" review

Commando (1985)

Directed by Mark L. Lester
Writing credits Jeph Loeb Matthew Weisman

Arnold Schwarzenegger.... John Matrix
Rae Dawn Chong.... Cindy
Dan Hedaya.... Arius
Vernon Wells.... Bennett
James Olson.... Gen. Franklin Kirby
David Patrick Kelly.... Sully
Alyssa Milano.... Jenny Matrix
Bill Duke.... Cooke

A Schwarzenegger masterpiece. If anyone else had starred in this movie, it wouldn't have been nearly as good. Only Arnold's deadpan delivery of the cheesiest lines imaginable could have elevated this movie into classic status. Who else could have gotten away with lines like: "Don't disturb my friend. He's dead tired." or "I eat Green Berets for breakfast!" AH-HAHAHAHA! Oh Arnold. You are the master.

So Arnold is a Commando. A fact cleverly hinted to in the title "Commando". The villains have taken his daughter so that they can force him to do their bidding - Commando style. Arnold has different ideas. Necks are snapped, malls are destroyed as Arnold lays down the law.

"Commando" ends with one of the most insanely spectacular slaughters of any Schwarzenegger flick. Arnold invades their island hideout and makes sure every enemy fighter dies horribly.This was back when being an action hero meant something. It meant destroying the bad guys single handed while laughing at the senseless slaughter you've created.

This movie is fantastic. See it. You'll be cheering.

SCORE: 4 out of 4 slaughtering commandos

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