Monday, August 14, 2006

"Species III" review

Species III (2004)

Directed by Brad Turner
Writing credits Dennis Feldman Ben Ripley

Robin Dunne.... Dean
Robert Knepper.... Dr. Abbot
Amelia Cooke.... Amelia
Christopher Neame.... Dr. Nicholas Turner
Savanna Fields.... Young Sara
Natasha Henstridge.... Eve
Sunny Mabrey.... Sara

I can sum up what was wrong with "Species III" in three words: Not sleazy enough. Of course, your definition of sleazy and mine may differ slightly. Perhaps only I would think that a movie with a topless alien babe having sex with some bumpkin on a toilet as not being sleazy enough. Perhaps I have issues. At any rate, "Species III" needed more bang for the buck. Know what I mean?

So once again some hot alien blonde lands on Earth. Unfortunately for the viewer, the Species girl has evolved to a point where she can't have sex with every single guy she sees. Dang it! What madness is this?! Now the Species girl has standards. Only other aliens butter her space muffin. Normal guys are left in the dirt. Some professor wants to nurture her and let her Species live on. Other half-breed Species want to make it with her and spend the second half of the movie hunting her down.

Well, the good news is that our blonde alien spends a good chunk of the movie topless. I think we can all agree that this is a good thing. A brunette half breed Species shows up in the second half of the movie and is actually hotter than the blonde. Man, the Species really have evolved. They're moving towards brunettes now. I think they need to go all the way and make "Species 4" with a redhead. So for hot Species chicks, "Species III" delivers.

The problem is that "Species III" really doesn't do much with them. Other than the toilet scene, there really wasn't as much alien copulating as I would have liked. The first two "Species" movies were big budget, sleaze-o-rama spectacles. I was hoping this one was going to make up for its low budget with some more Species loving. No such luck.

Still, "Species III" is probably worth a look. It's a decent straight to video flick.

SCORE: 2 out of 4 killer blonde Species

No comments: