Thursday, March 23, 2006

"Burial of the Rats" review

Burial of the Rats (1995)

Directed by Dan Golden
Writing credits Adrien Hein Tara McCann

Adrienne Barbeau.... The Queen
Maria Ford.... Madeleine
Kevin Alber.... Bram Stoker
Nikki Fritz.... Rat Woman
Linnea Quigley.... Rat Woman

Bram Stoker gets kidnapped by an all-female cult. The cult of the Rat Women. At first, they want to feed him to the rats because he's another lousy, lying, worthless man. But Bram soon proves his worth to the rat ladies as it becomes clear that his writing powers may be beneficial to their cause. His graphic descriptions of their carnage will drive fear into the hearts of men. One of the rat women, (Maria Ford), starts to fall under his spell. Bram wants to prove his love for his princess and hopefully get out of Rat Women land alive.

As goofy movies about rat women go, this was pretty good. I enjoyed it. Adrienne Barbeau showed as much dignity as a woman with rats crawling on her lap possibly could. Maria Ford was pretty good as the naive sex kitten. She gets topless as do many other rat women. The Queen likes to send rats to do her murderous bidding. These rats must be famished because they strip bodies to the bone faster than a piranha. "Burial of the Rats" has blood, guts, hungry rats and topless rat women. It's got most everything a B-movie needs. It's worth a look.

One last thing, you might be tempted to rent this because you noticed that Linnea Quigley and Nikki Fritz are in it. Don't be fooled. Fritz is in it for five seconds at the most. Quigley pops up three or four times. Both clock in at less than a minute and do absolutely nothing. I found that slightly disappointing because I rented it with the hopes that all of the rat women would get their chance to shine. But some rat women were greater than others. Rats.

SCORE: 2 out of 4 sexy rat women

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I love Adrienne Barboobs!