Saturday, March 11, 2006

"Sorority House Vampires from Hell" review

Sorority House Vampires from Hell (1998)

Directed by Geoffrey De Vallois Eugene James
Writing credits Geoffrey De Vallois Dennis Devine

J.J. Rodgers.... Sue Ann
Kathy Presgrave.... Buffy

This movie is awful. Beyond terrible. Nothing can save it from the fiery death it deserves. I was suckered into buying a ten pack of DVD's because of this movie. How could I, a mortal man, resist the call of a movie called "Sorority House Vampires from Hell"? I'm only human! I bought it as a gift for my cousin's birthday. We are now scared to watch the other nine movies. If I was a real man, I'd watch them all back to back until my soul is ripped from my body. We watched "Busty Cops" later that night so we bounced back a little bit.

In order to describe this nightmare, I'd have to think about it. That would mean my brain may explode. I had broken my toe a day before watching this. After viewing this atrocity, the pain in my head was actually greater than the pain in my toe. The movie starts off with a bunch of naked women dancing around to rock music. So far, so naked. Then the movie runs headfirst into complete incoherence. Some thin woman wants to suck some blood and there's a sorority and some other stuff and I had no idea what was going on.

This movie is seriously terrible. There are a couple of topless women but the movie is filmed so incompetently that it's hard to see their breasts. Only naked women could have saved this one.

I order this movie back to Hell! Take your ten pack of pain with you, demon spawn!



TheBMovieMaster said...

I'm curious cause I'm trying to remember a movie I once saw, is the end of the movie a realization that the whole thing was a loction commercial? Or on that matter did anyone ever utter the line, "I wasn't expecting this" only to be replied "No one expects the Spanish Inquision"?

Dr. Gore said...

That's a good question but I don't have a good answer. I have exorcized this demon out of my mind. It has been banished back to the underworld, never to be seen again. Well, at least never to be seen again, (or thought of), by me.