Friday, January 20, 2006

"Underworld" review

Underworld (2003)

Directed by Len Wiseman
Writing credits Kevin Grevioux and Len Wiseman

Kate Beckinsale.... Selene
Scott Speedman.... Michael Corvin
Michael Sheen.... Lucian

Kate Beckinsale wears a skin tight leather outfit and kills werewolves. What more do you need? She is a death dealer, dealing death to werewolves. The werewolves disagree with her profession. It's war. A human gets caught in the crossfire for reasons too confusing to explain. He is not important. What is important is Beckinsale dealing skin tight leather death.

When "Underworld" was first announced, it was described as "Romeo and Juliet with vampires and werewolves". This description sent shivers down my spine. Oh great! They're going to screw up another horror flick! Well, thankfully the filmmakers came to their senses and realized they didn't need some love story mucking up their monster battle royale. This is the key to Underworld's success: Kill the romance, pump up the violence. I can count the amount of times Beckinsale and the human kissed on one finger. That was more than enough.

So Beckinsale hops in a leather outfit and proceeds to lay waste to the werewolves. The movie speeds right along and doesn't waste time with plot, romance or any other filler that takes away from slow motion carnage.

SCORE: 3 out of 4 for skin tight death dealing Beckinsale

and some more skin tight death dealing

and a little more leather wearing Beckinsale.

You know, for my money, I just can't get enough of hot women killing monsters/werewolves/aliens while wearing skin tight outfits.

1 comment:

the sneering (homo-phobic) snob said...

I want to bugger Kate Beckinsale (as she was when she was 18, not as she is now obviously)