Thursday, January 26, 2006

"Hulk" review

Hulk (2003)

Directed by Ang Lee

Writing credits Stan Lee (Marvel comic book character) and Jack Kirby
James Schamus

Eric Bana.... Bruce Banner
Jennifer Connelly.... Betty Ross
Sam Elliott.... Ross

Perhaps I'm repressing childhood memories too but I recall the Hulk being a lot angrier in the comic book. The comic book story of the Hulk is basically about a guy who's cursed. But he's cursed with a separate and distinct violent personality. He's not just inflicted with green monster mood swings. Where was the Hulk's charming personality? (Hulk hates puny Banner!) And where was the rage? (Hulk Smash!) I also don't recall the Hulk being so pensive. Every scene gave him an opportunity to reflect on his lost life. Should they have scheduled a therapy session for the monster? "Good, good, let it all out. Tell me about your childhood." "Hulk no play with other kids. RAARRRRR!!" He was one sulking Hulk. But most importantly, where was the fun? I'm sorry but this movie was a disaster.

No fun, no excitement, no Hulk! At least not the Hulk I remember. Or want. All right, it had two cool scenes. There was one scene where the Hulk was playing animal control with a bunch of drooling mutant puppies. The other has the Hulk bashing some tanks in the desert. That is it. End of story. The rest of the movie has people speaking to each other in hushed tones. Lots of whispering. So much whispering in fact that my partner in movie crime, (my dad), fell asleep. Twice! This movie is literally a snooze.

Oh me. Oh my. It was no good. Another aspect that this movie desperately needed was a super villain. Super heroes fight super villains. Not the Hulk though. He'd rather be depressed. The Rhino would have been great. Anything would have been great. Sigh. Now I'm depressed.

SCORE: 1 out of 4 pissed Hulks

Puny Humans screw up my movie! RAARRRRRR!!!!

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