Sunday, April 16, 2006

"Paycheck" review

Paycheck (2003)

Directed by John Woo
Writing credits Philip K. Dick Dean Georgaris

Ben Affleck.... Michael Jennings
Aaron Eckhart.... James Rethrick
Uma Thurman.... Dr. Rachel Porter
Paul Giamatti.... Shorty

I got very depressed after I watched "Paycheck". The future was revealed to me. Therefore, I have no future. Well, a bleak movie-going future at least. The truth hit me hard: Hollywood makes the majority of their movies as stupid as possible and there is nothing in the world I can do about it.

Actually, there is only one thing I can do about it and that's stop going to the movies. Of course that's not really an option. But it's movies like "Paycheck" that give me a harsh reminder of what mainstream Hollywood has in store for me now and until the end of time: One lame brained flick after another. Oh sure, I know Hollywood makes most of their product for teenagers but do their movies have to be this idiotic?

"Paycheck" is the story of Ben Affleck on the run with the greatest envelope in the world. He has a lot of knick-knacks in it that may save his life. Remember this phrase: "Ahh, Whatever!" You will be repeating it numerous times throughout this movie. How does Affleck know when to use all this junk? What if he uses it in the wrong order? Where did he get the key for the mall utility closet? Why did he kick the bullets at the third subway wire instead of shooting the guy? Why? How? Huh?!! Ahh Whatever!

The good news is that there are some decent action scenes that save "Paycheck" from the garbage can. There is a good motorcycle chase scene, (where did Affleck learn to drive like a Hollywood stunt driver...ahh who cares?) and a good final showdown back at the lab. But the movie is just too ridiculous.

SCORE: 1.5 out of 4 action hero Afflecks

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