Tuesday, July 04, 2006

"D-Tox" review

D-Tox (2002)

Directed by Jim Gillespie
Writing credits Ron L. Brinkerhoff

Sylvester Stallone.... FBI Agent Jake Malloy
Charles S. Dutton.... Hendricks
Polly Walker.... Jenny
Kris Kristofferson.... Doc
Mif.... Brandon
Jeffrey Wright.... Jaworski

Stallone travels into a winter wonderland to have a slasher movie. He's a burnt out cop recuperating in some frozen gulag. How anyone could get healthy in a place like that is beyond me. Faster than it takes to blink, a serial killer springs out of the snow and decides he hates cops, especially Stallone. The battle is on.

The movie zoomed ahead without a second of mystery or suspense. It couldn't wait to end. It actually started off semi-interesting. Once Stallone hits the D-Tox center however, the filmmakers took a weed whacker to the movie. It moved like a Michael Bay movie on steroids.

Stallone did have a cool fight at the end with the killer. I'll give it that. But it's all "been there, done that". I think the filmmakers figured that out about the midway point and hit the gas pedal to the finish line.

SCORE: 1.5 out of 4 Stallones in therapy

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