Friday, June 16, 2006

"Angel" review

Angel (1984)

Directed by Robert Vincent O'Neill
Writing credits Joseph Michael Cala Robert Vincent O'Neill

Cliff Gorman.... Lt. Andrews
Susan Tyrrell.... Solly Mosler
Dick Shawn.... Mae
Rory Calhoun.... Kit Carson
Donna Wilkes.... Molly Stewart(Angel)

I bought this video for three bucks. You don't know how long I've been staring at the video box cover of "Angel" and wondering when I was going to get around to watching it. The front cover of "Angel" is pure exploitation. It has Angel on the left side of the cover wearing pigtails and holding some schoolbooks. The right side of the front cover has Angel in high heels and a short red skirt. The tag line is "High School Honor Student by day. Hollywood Hooker by night." Classic! This is a film that no sleazy film lover could possibly resist.

One thing you can say about the tag line for "Angel": It didn't lie. So Angel is a high school honor student by day and a Hollywood hooker by night. She hangs out with other ladies of the night and tries to earn some money. A mad killer is stalking Hollywood Blvd. and wants to slice and dice some hookers. Angel won't stand for it. She's got a gun that's bigger than she is and she can't wait to use it.
Well, I wanted to love this movie but it just wasn't sleazy enough for me. I should have known the video box cover was too good to be true. The main problem with "Angel" is that Angel does not get naked. Does NOT get naked. I found this to be troublesome since she was supposed to be a Hollywood hooker. Not only that, she doesn't have any sex scenes in the entire movie. No sex scenes for a Hollywood hooker movie? She even says at one point, "I've had sex with hundreds of men…" When was that Angel? Was that in a different movie?

That's the basic problem with "Angel". It's trying to be a real movie when it should have been sticking to being extra sleazy. "Angel" gets pretty emotional for a Hollywood hooker flick. Angel tends to cry a lot about her family life or lack thereof. Not to seem heartless but I don't really want to see Angel weeping uncontrollably. There are a few scenes of gratuitous female nudity at the high school locker room and some decent fight scenes but overall "Angel" was kind of a letdown.

Great video box cover. So-so B-flick.

SCORE: 2 out of 4 Hollywood Angels


the sneering (homo-phobic) snob said...

dr. gore, on the poster above could you somehow, (perhaps electronically, or with some computer wizardry), mask out the hot pants and black top that donna is wearing on the right, then her beatiful young naked body underneath would come into full veiw, making the poster a hundred times better.

Dr. Gore ( said...

I wish I had that power. That would be a good trick. Unfortunately, this Angel is going to have to stay clothed.

But if I did have that kind of wizardry at my fingertips, I think I would expose Megan Fox throughout most of "Transformers". She'd be transforming into a naked beauty with great regularity.

the sneering (homo-phobic) snob said...

great idea, megan fox is one of the most breathtakingly gorgeous chicks in the history of breathtakingly gorgeous chicks.