Monday, June 05, 2006

"" review (2000)

Directed by Miles Feldman
Writing credits Miles Feldman

Jena Romano.... Mary
Adam Weiner.... Alex
Tawnya Richardson.... Ricci
Travis Shakespeare.... Alex

Oh man, what a letdown. This should have been an easy slam dunk. Any video box that promises, "…nine luscious ladies romping together in a house, while 20 video cameras capture their every move…" gets my vote. Surely something worthwhile should happen when you log onto "". Bad news. Their website needs a lot of work.

So nine luscious ladies check into a house run by two horny dot-com entrepreneurs. They want the women to do something interesting so that they can make some dough. So what's missing from this picture? How about doing something interesting? A masked killer shows up to slice and dice the women but no one really cares until the very end.

"" is shot on super cheap video and it looks even cheaper. Its ultra low budget eventually betrays it as it becomes apparent that the filmmakers couldn't afford any nudity from their stars. All of the naked breast shots are from some random girl and they're all from the neck down. They used the same body double for almost every scene. How lame is that? I thought these girls were supposed to be exhibitionists. Where's the exhibition? It's on a different website.

You can forget about the horror scenes saving this one. All we have here is fully clothed wild girls getting their throats slit by some loser in a black overcoat. "" had a great concept but the actual movie couldn't live up to its high sleaze potential.

SCORE: 1 out of 4 for incompetent website action

OK ladies, could you move away from the plant? And the exercise equipment?

Could you turn around please? Could you? Would you?

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