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Tuesday, February 01, 2011

"Batbabe: The Dark Nightie" review

Batbabe: The Dark Nightie

Director: John Bacchus
Writers: John Bacchus Michael Raso

Darian Caine ... Wendy Wane / BatBabe
Robert Mandara ... The Jerker
Molly Heartbreaker ... Henrietta Bent
Jackie Stevens ... Rachel Balls
Clancy Fitzsimmons ... Commissioner Boredom
Andrea Jaxx ... Nude Cyclist
Ruby Larocca ... Pool Girl 1
Sierra Dream ... Pool Girl 2

I was feeling nostalgic. That's my excuse. I was thinking back to the old softcore days and nights of Julian Wells and A.J. Khan. Reminiscing on the Golden Years of Seduction Cinema. I wondered what those cheap filmmakers were up to these days. Had they found any suitable replacements for Ms. Wells and Khan? What does the current crop of Seduction Cinema women have to offer? I decided that "Batbabe: the Dark Nightie" had the greatest chance of showcasing Seduction Cinema's finest.

"Batbabe" is about Batbabe. A babe who dresses like a bat. She's a stripper by day and BatBabe by night. Actually she strips at night and hangs out as BatBabe during the day as well. She's very busy. Anyway, her arch enemy is the evil Jerker. Jerker is a madman who wants to steal all of the porno in the city so the citizens will go crazy with lust. He's hoping for a semen flood which will fill the streets with sticky vengeance. Batbabe won't stand for this ejaculating injustice. Batbabe beats up a bunch of people, manages to get involved in some facsimiles of sex scenes, and the Jerker jerks it all movie long. At least he had fun.

I can tell you one thing about "Batbabe". The Jerker was successful in stealing the porno from the city. In fact, he was so successful he managed to steal it right out of this movie. Amazingly, "Batbabe" doesn't have one good sex scene. Not one scene to linger over and enjoy. Not one lousy, stinking sex scene to jerk it like the Jerker would. There isn't anything to recommend, commend or even talk about in regards to this film.

After suffering through "Batbabe", I'm reminded why I don't bother with Seduction Cinema anymore. The glory days are over. Their current group of ladies does not measure up to the mighty Julian Wells and AJ Khan. All of these women look like they took the day off from the strip club so they could be filmed fumbling through a half hearted sex scene. Only Darian Caine, (Batbabe), remains from the Misty Mundae days. She does what she can but even she can't manage to add any excitement to this softcore dud.

I was very tempted to throw "Batbabe" into the Landfill. It was so close to Landfill glory. But "Batbabe" does have a lot of nudity so I have to give it one point for that. But that's the only thing that saves it from the garbage dump. Do yourself a favor and skip this one. Check out "Seduction of Misty Mundae" for Seduction Cinema satisfaction. Don't let the Jerker spooge on you.

SCORE: 1 out of 4 Batbabes

8 comments:

Anna-Sofie said...

I love following your blog.

Dr. Gore said...

Thanks for following.

the sneering (homo-phobic) snob said...

Its a shame The Jerker is in the shot on the DVD cover otherwise it would have been a great masturbation aid. By the way, i wonder if the British film industry will ever produce anything that is even 100th as good as "Batbabe: The Dark Nightie"...er...i very much doubt it, just to put things into the proper perspective again.

Dr. Gore said...

The true shame is that the Jerker is a man. Since this was Seduction Cinema, I was hoping this was going to be an all woman affair. Alas the Jerker jerked it and balls were blue. So very blue.

willy jerk-off said...

Anna-Sofie is a gorgeous chick, i`d love to perform every sex-act in the known universe on her

Dr. Gore said...

She's very nice.

Mr. Xploit, Esquire said...

man, Seduction Cinema has really fallen. who can we depend on now? jim wynorski? not likely. who dr gore? who?

Dr. Gore said...

Who indeed. I don't believe I can answer that. Who is committed to the softcore arts? Wynorksi is committed to making money. It's just a coincidence that it happens to involve softcore. Based on the quality of "Batbabe", Seduction Cinema is dead. It just doesn't know it yet. It's death rattle is going on longer than expected.