Monday, September 16, 2013

"Baby Dolls Behind Bars" review

Baby Dolls Behind Bars (2012)





Ahh late night Cinemax. Where would I be without you? For that matter, where would Fred Olen Ray be without you? Nowhere that's where. Yeah, using double negatives and hustling suckers for quarters in the circus sideshow that is his life. Thank the Gods there are so many women out there who want to bless us with their surgically enhanced bodies performing a little late night lesbian kissing and tribbing. No pegging though. That's too hardcore for Ray and his softcore romps.

"Baby Dolls Behind Bars" is another in a long line of borderline worthless softcore flicks from Ray and his buxom partners in crime. This time the story revolves a blonde who breaks into prison to stop a jewel thief. Or maybe she gets herself caught. Actually she could have been going undercover. Ahh who cares why she's there? Anyway she runs into a corrupt warden, (the lovely Christine Nguyen), who wears a dog collar and likes having lesbian sex. Then some other stuff happens and some more sex and then I went to bed.

This is a weaker entry in the Ray oevure. What makes one softcore movie better than another you ask? Why the sex scenes of course. This one has the same cast dry humping the same people in the same positions. More of the same, etc, etc. zzzz... The only thing that saves this movie from complete oblivion is Christine Nguyen. My God she's lovely. She always give me the impression that she enjoys having these softcore adventures and she's a pleasure to watch. Her sex scene in the cabin with the jewel thief was magical.

So if you're up late and "Baby Dolls Behind Bars" is on, let a good half hour go by and hold on for the Nguyen scene. It's the only scene worth watching.  Christine and her dog collar choker bring some sleazy joy to this barren B-prison experience.

SCORE: 1.5 out of 4 dog collar wardens


Thursday, September 05, 2013

Wednesday, September 04, 2013

Julie K Smith is hot

Leather, boots, Julie catwoman...
Now this I remember. It's all coming back to me now.