Saturday, August 25, 2007

"Killing Me Softly" review

Killing Me Softly (2002)

Director: Kaige Chen
Writers: Kara Lindstrom

Heather Graham ... Alice
Joseph Fiennes ... Adam
Natascha McElhone ... Deborah
Ulrich Thomsen ... Klaus

Heather Graham is in trouble. She’s in a bad movie and there is no escape. She falls hard for a mountain climber. Yes, a mountain climber. Joseph Fiennes is the dashing stud who takes Heather away from her mundane boyfriend and introduces her to a life of wild sexual abandon. They even try the missionary position! Alas, there is trouble in paradise as mysterious letters start showing up warning Heather of the terrible movie she’s in. This inspires her to act like there’s something interesting going on when the only thing interesting in this movie is figuring out when she’s going to get naked again.

Ever since seeing Heather Graham in “Austin Powers” as Felicity Shagwell, (and the accompanying Lenny Kravitz video for “American Woman”), I’ve longed for the day when Heather would show her beautiful breasts to the world. Like so many other horny suckers out there, I rented this movie for just that purpose. I had no idea what the story was about nor did I care. I just wanted Graham.

Well, ten minutes into the movie Graham is getting her shirt ripped open by Joseph Fiennes so he can have his way with her Grahams. Twenty minutes into the movie, she’s moved in with him for some more naked posings. Another twenty minutes go by and they’re married and having lame S&M sex on their honeymoon. By the hour mark, Graham is too suspicious of her intense husband to get naked again. At this point, the viewer sits back as the movie kills him softly with its inane dialogue, atrocious acting and various other scenes that don’t have anything to do with Heather Graham getting naked.

So “Killing Me Softly” peaks in the first ten minutes and goes downhill from there. On the plus side, “Killing Me Softly” has some really cheesy acting which leads to a lot of good laughs. I’m usually not one to bash acting abilities, but this movie does Heather Graham no favors. Graham did not convince me of any emotion she put on display. I didn’t believe that she was in love with Fiennes, obsessed with Fiennes, afraid of Fiennes, or even knew who Fiennes was. As a horny super agent in “Austin Powers”, she had reached the pinnacle of her acting ability. “Killing Me Softly” pushes her too hard and allowed the audience to have many belly laughs at her expense.

Since most of Heather Graham’s naked scenes in “Killing Me Softly” can be found on the internet, skip this movie and start downloading. You’ll miss some good laughs but you’ll see Heather in all her glory and that’s what’s important here.

SCORE: 1.5 out of 4 silk stalkings

No comments: