Saturday, November 26, 2005

"2 Fast 2 Furious" review

2 Fast 2 Furious (2003)

Directed by John Singleton

Paul Walker....Brian O'Conner
Tyrese Gibson.... Roman Pearce
Eva Mendes.... Monica Fuentes
Cole Hauser.... Carter Verone
Ludacris.... Tej
Devon Aoki.... Suki

"2 Fast 2 Furious" is the embodiment of modern action movie formulas. PG-13. Rap music blasting. Multi-ethnic cast. This flick could play in any corner of the globe and would surely appeal to someone. They set it in Miami which is one of the most heavily mixed cities in America. You have a white guy as the star who is best friends with a black guy. Classic. Then they have them follow around a beautiful Latin woman as a potential love interest. Great. They even threw in a hot Asian girl who had no other function than to be a hot Asian girl. I loved her car readout monitor too. It looked like an angry "Hello Kitty!".

So "2 Fast 2 Furious" is right off the cookie cutter Hollywood action flick assembly line. People love seeing other people who look just like them in movies. So dang it, put them all in! Soon Hollywood will break down barriers in India and China, (one billion potential movie ticket buyers in each country people!), and we can get a Bombay set action movie starring some white action hero and his lovable sidekick from the Kashmir valley. Oh and throw in Suki from this flick for the love interest. Cha-ching.

As far as the racing scenes go, "2 Fast 2 Furious" is pretty good. The speedometers got more close-ups than some of the cast members. Actually the cars probably should have gotten credited in the cast as well. There seems to be one way to do a racing scene: Close-ups on the drivers eyes, then on the speedometer as it goes up and up, then to the cars zipping by, then repeat from step one. As a movie, "2 Fast 2 Furious" gets a little more ridiculous as it goes on. There's only so many cars racing by I can watch and still say cool. It probably lasted as long as it could before dipping into vroom vroom tedium.

SCORE: 2 out of 4 hot chicks sitting on a fast car


the sneering (homo-phobic) snob said...

why cant they make these films with all birds and no geezers that would be so much better, the producers must know that 95% of the the audience for these films is rampantly heterosexual geezers who just want to see as many breathtakingly beautiful gorgeous sexy, (preferably completely naked), young birds as possible on the screen, they do not want to see geezers. Just imagine 2 hours of breathtakingly beautiful gorgeous sexy, (preferably completely naked), young birds cavorting around on screen, driving fast cars, and having pit stops every 5 minutes to indulge in graphic lesbian encounters with other breathtakingly beautiful gorgeous sexy, (preferably completely naked), young birds, and not a geezer anywhere to be seen for the entirety of the movie, now that would be perfection.

Dr. Gore ( said...

Your movie idea sounds great. I've always thought that only hot women should be allowed to drive sports cars. In fact I was driving down the PCH one Sunday and I spotted a caravan of Ferraris cruising north. They all pull into a Coffee Bean and out step five middle-aged men. Talk about a bummer. The babe factor in the "Fast and Furious" movies is certainly what saves it at times. Eva Mendes has a little something special going on. She pops in my head and my pants because she has a giant naked billboard on Sunset right now. I think I'll cruise by it in a rented sports car to get a fast and furious look at it.