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Sunday, November 09, 2008

"Evilution" review

Evilution (2008)

Director: Chris Conlee
Writer: Brian Patrick O'Toole (writer)

Jonathan Breck ... Col Serna
James Duval ... Asia Mark
Guillermo Díaz ... Killah-B
Noel Gugliemi ... Random
Peter Stickles ... Stanfa
Nathan Bexton ... The Manager
Eric Peter-Kaiser ... Darren Hall
Tim Colceri ... Sgt. Gabriel Collins
Bruna Rubio ... Random's girl
Marie Antoinette ... Infected Tenant
Sandra Ramírez ... Madeline 'Maddie' Gilbert
Katie Cazorla ... Nikki

I was sent this DVD screener. The army is experimenting with a deadly toxin which turns people into mindless zombies. An army captain escapes from the Iraq war to bring this important weaponized biological agent back to America. 28 days later he has rented a terrible apartment in order to continue his research into how his evil red liquid is able to turn an ordinary human into a raging cannibal. The local gangbangers stop by to welcome him to the neighborhood. The captain sizes them up as great guinea pigs. Soon the toxin is released and the mutated zombies rampage through the apartment building.

What is it about the zombies of today? They are so much faster and stronger than their previous incarnations. I miss the old zombies who would lumber around as their limbs slowly rotted away. The current crop of the undead is more athletic and powerful than they were even when they were alive. Dying was the best thing to ever happen to them. The zombies in "Evilution" are no exception as they chase down any fresh meat they see with amazing corpse-like agility.

Once the gangbanger gets infected the movie kicks into gear. The apartment building's residents gets turned into mutants fairly quickly. There's plenty of blood and guts as the zombies harvest various organs for dinner. I can't say I was really shocked by any of the horror scenes as it felt like I had seen it all before. Biting arms, biting throats, blood squirts, screams etc. You know the drill. But I was slightly shocked by the (lack of) nudity on the part of the main B-movie babe.

You can always tell whether or not a girl is going to take her top off in a B-movie by how earnestly she's acting. One of the army guy's neighbors invites him to dinner and shows off her amazing cleavage during the main course. As I watched her act her heart out, I knew she was never going to get naked. She was trying too hard. My fears were confirmed when later on there was a half-hearted sex scene in which she kept her dress on. This is a B-movie sin. Never show off a woman's cleavage unless you plan on having a payoff scene where she rips her top off.

On the flip side of that argument, you can always tell when a woman is going to get naked in a B-movie. This one's not too hard to figure out. One scene had a blonde woman come walking into the hallway with just a towel on as the zombies were running riot. I knew that towel wasn't going to last long. Sure enough, the towel was the first thing to go as the zombies leapt for her naked body. It's that kind of attention to the exploitation details I appreciate. Point for "Evilution" for that scene.

Overall, "Evilution" is a decent B-flick with elements of "Demons", "Shivers" and "28 Days Later". It moves along and gives you a healthy helping of gore to go with your movie night. If you need another fast moving zombie flick, it's worth checking out.

SCORE: 2.5 out of 4 zombie demons

4 comments:

  1. Sounds decent :-)

    Nice Review!

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  2. Anonymous6:06 PM

    dr. gore, from what you say this should be worth watching for the 3 gorgeous sexy birds alone, although i can fully understand your rage at not seeing the birds knockers, when theres a gorgeous sexy bird in a film with massive knockers its always a con if we dont get to see the knockers, remember that incredible bird at the beginning of "russ meyers supervixens" she was one of the most unbeleivable birds of all time and when we didn`t get to see her astonishing tits and arse and twat i felt like i`d been cheated big time. I will be looking for this film though because i love zombie movies, i think they are the best kind of horror film, that little chinese bird might have a copy the next time i see her, shes been away for a couple of weeks to have a baby, so i dont think i`m ever gonna` get that blow job from her cos` if her husband finds out i fancy his bird he might beat me up. Anyway, getting back to sexy zombie birds in horror films, another one of my all time favorites is "sharon ceccatti" the bird who played the nurse zombie in george a. romeros 1978 cult masterwork "dawn of the dead" i dont know how old she was in `78 cos` imdb dont give her date of birth but i always think she looks so sweet and sexy when she moves, (although if memory serves me well she only gets one close-up in the whole movie), can you imagine her having a cigarette between takes and then romero shouting "action sharon" and then she would start her sweet sexy little movements, it would have been so charming to have been on the set to see that, and there were also a couple of gorgeous little blonde bird zombies eating the bikers guts if you recall. If you remember there were also some really cute sexy bird zombies in romero`s 1985 cult masterwork "day of the dead", (still the greatest horror film of all time in my opinion), like the bird in the red dress at the beginning, and the other bird wearing the ringmasters hat, and one of the birds who burst into the room at the end when gary klar shoots himself, i`d be genuinely interested to know whether or not you actually do recall any of the gorgeous sexy birds that i`ve talked about, and whether or not you remeber them with the same levels of fondness that i do?, from your old mate "the sneering (homo-phobic) snob".

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  3. I'm ashamed to say I've never seen "Supervixens". I'm surprised to hear that a large breasted woman in a Russ Meyer movie did not get topless. That is a little shocking. I have seen Dawn and Day of the Dead but I don't recall the zombie women you're referring to. You've stumped me once again. From "Dawn of the Dead", my most vivid memory is when the zombie stands up near the helicopter and the top of his head gets lopped off from the rotating blades. "Day of the Dead" sticks in my head because of Bub the zombie. I also remember hating one of the army guys. It's been awhile since I've seen those two flicks.

    But when I think sexy zombies, I still fall back to Mindy Clarke from "Return of the Living Dead 3" and the undead softball jersey-wearing babe from "Land of the Dead". Mindy Clarke would be hard to beat in the undead pageant.

    Sorry to hear about your fellatio dilemma. At least she seems to have a sizeable portion of B-movies. Although I usually stay away from the video store these days in favor of Netflix, I'd make an exception if there was a babe on the other side of the counter.

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  4. Anonymous9:53 AM

    "You can always tell whether or not a girl is going to take her top off in a B-movie by how earnestly she's acting" - Never a truer word spoken.

    Many a night, when I was younger and before one had access to the net or the video store, would I be trying to make judgements on whether a film would show anything.

    It got to the point when if I looked at the year it was made that would help. Remember this only being for films on the TV. 1960's - very little, just hints. Early 1970's - maybe some cleavage or a side shot. Mid - late 70's - A good chance, especially if the title was more obscure.

    Your statement sit's up there with the known fact that the large breasted, artists impression woman on the front cover bears no resemblance to the chick in the film!

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